Ever notice how babies (and toddlers…and some adults) just love looking at their reflection in the mirror? Aside from it being super cute to watch as babies coo at themselves, looking into the mirror helps with their development and eventually they discover that the reflection they’ve been looking at & kissing all of this time is themselves.
In adulthood, relationships act as the mirror as we learn about ourselves. It’s pretty well accepted that our most important lessons come through our relationships with others. In the article Relationships as Spiritual Mirrors, I wrote: every person you meet, every situation you encounter – offers you a mirror to see your own reflection on a soul level. This particularly applies to romantic and familial relationships, but coworkers, clients and friends mirror us and teach us lessons as well.
Sometimes when we’re in the thick of the pain or having a rough time in a relationship, it’s hard to remember that we have something important to learn in the experience. It’s only later, upon reflecting on the situation, that we realize it was something we needed to learn. Bonus points if we have learned our lesson and don’t have to repeat it.
We may be either on the giving or receiving end of these experiences, and there will be a lesson offered both ways. We haven’t fully learned our lesson until we can see how we helped to arrange matters. In other words, what did we do to set it up? This isn’t a matter of blame. Really, it’s not! But think about it next time: what part of your soul is being reflected back to you in this scenario?
I’ve come to realize that in relationships, we are so accustomed to a sort of cause and effect conditioning, like “You yelled at me first!”, that the concept of us giving the other person involved the proverbial bat and pointing to our own head is a difficult pill to swallow. But, when you know that most everything that happens to you is drawn through the power of your own thought (whether it’s conscious or subconscious), then there’s no turning back, and there’s no more playing the role of the “poor me” victim. Well, you certainly can continue that, but it’ll feel less authentic.
We don’t have to hold onto the pain we’ve lived through to prove that it existed. We don’t need to keep coming up with evidence of the “wrongness” of the other person involved. We can – and should – take responsibility for our part of the lesson and move on. This is part of what makes us human.
If you go through some relationship bumps in the road, think of it as an opportunity to learn some karmic relationship lessons and to help you grow on a soul level. It won’t take away the pain, but it can help shed some light into the why.
Do you believe people are a reflection of who we are? Do you think we manifest the relationships and situations that come into our lives?
Like what you read here? Subscribe to The Daily Awe! Or share this article with your friends, family and Facebook pals!