Our deepest wounds surround our greatest gifts.
I read that sentence the other day while reading an article on Psychology Today. It struck a chord with me. So what does it mean?
If you feel like you are “too much” of something – too sensitive, think too much, too intense or too much of anything – Why not put a positive spin on that “too much”? Your deep sensitivity helps you understand people and makes you the one your friends come to when they need a shoulder. Your constant thinking makes you self-aware. Your intensity makes you passionate, driven.
Or do you think you’re “not enough” of something? Too shy, too quiet, too passive, too soft. Putting a positive spin on that, we could say you’re a good listener, humble and have a sense of grace about you that doesn’t require you to assert yourself in forceful ways.
You might feel a bit ambivalent about these qualities in yourself – you are sensitive & thoughtful, but people take advantage of these in you.
The very qualities we’re most ashamed of — the ones we try to sweep under the rug so others don’t notice – are key in finding true happiness within ourselves. Ken Page calls these your “core gifts”
Core gifts are not the same as talents or skills. In fact, until we understand them, they often feel like shameful weaknesses, or as parts of ourselves too vulnerable to expose. Yet they are where our soul lives. They are like the bone marrow of our psyche, generating a living stream of impulses toward intimacy and authentic self-expression. But gifts aren’t hall-passes to happiness. They get us into trouble again and again. We become most defensive-or most naïve-around them. They challenge us and the people we care about. They ask more of us than we want to give. And we can be devastated when we feel them betrayed or rejected.
What are some of your core gifts? What feels more like a curse than a gift to you? These would be qualities that you see as a weakness or a fault but in fact are a great strength & gift. As you think of them, and reframe the way you think of them, you’ll let your inner light shine and maybe even see your life in a new way.
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