Today’s article is inspired by Heather’s letter to me, below. My deepest thanks go out to Heather for sharing her story! My answers to her questions are below. 

Screen shot 2013-05-16 at 8.18.53 PMThe past year or so has been the most difficult of my adult life. Mainly because I lost my grandfather in March of last year. As a result, my priorities have gotten mixed up, I’ve neglected relationships I should have nurtured and pursued unhealthy ones. My career is very unstable at the moment and I’ve felt very disconnected from the person I used to be. In the last few months, I’ve been trying very hard to correct that. Usually, I find a healthy outlet through writing but even that has been blocked this past year. So, once the weather turned warm, I decided to try gardening.

Yesterday, I was outside in the colder than average temps, transplanting some day lilies. Then, near the edge of my garden, I unearthed a green glass marble. I feel like this is a message from someone, possibly my grandfather. I have no idea what it means specifically, but believe in my heart that it is a good omen. I guess my question is, is it possible for spirits of those we love to communicate with us in such a physical way? I put the marble on my night stand and plan to keep it as a good luck charm.

Also, my sister and I took my grandmother and mother out to lunch on Saturday, as an early Mother’s Day gift. After we left the restaurant, I drove my grandmother in my grandfather’s car (she can’t get into my mom’s Jeep very well) and my mom and sister followed us in the other vehicle. A little ways down a windy, wooded road, a huge bird swooped down and flew just above the car I was driving, right along with us for maybe a mile. I even pointed it out to my grandmother, but from our angle I could only see the giant wingspan. Later, my mother told me that she saw it from behind us, and that it was a blue heron.

Could this have been another message from my grandfather? Possibly, “Hey! Be careful driving my car!”

If so, that was two messages/signs within two days. And how you separate out the wishful thinking from the actual messages? I so much want to feel my grandfather’s energy near me, I’m afraid I may be making it up. Do you have any thoughts or ideas on this matter?

___________________________________________________________________________

My response:

Spirit absolutely speaks to us through physical signs and animal totems. My deceased grandmother speaks to me and my mom through dimes. Hundreds of people have emailed me over the past couple years to tell me their stories of finding dimes – messages they feel are from loved ones on the other side. If you feel it in your heart and soul that it’s a message from your grandfather, trust that it is. 

Our deceased relatives and Spirit Guides speak to us all of the time – whether or not we notice it is up to us. It is rare that Spirit speaks to us in words. Most often messages are carried to us by intermediaries, representatives of Spirit — animals, birds, small physical tokens. Spirit can easily get our attention in this way. It’s up to us to pay attention, and trust that it is from our loved ones.

How to separate wishful thinking from actual messages

This is a common question, and I think it’s something all of us – even those who are used to working with Spirit – have asked ourselves. I always say: don’t think about it too much. If your initial, gut reaction is that the green marble is from your grandfather, then it is. It is only when our conscious minds – our egos – start getting involved in the thought process that we begin to doubt that it’s a real message and wonder if it’s our imagination. Listen to your gut, initial reaction.

As for these two events happening in the span of two days, Heather – in my experience these signs often come in twos. Because Spirit knows we are going to doubt it and wonder if we’re making these things up, they give us a second sign/chance/answer. Your grandfather wanted you to know that it was him who left the marble, so he spoke to you through the blue heron as confirmation. It is especially telling since he chose to come to you when you were with your grandmother.

Readers – what do you think? Have you ever had these experiences? How do you separate your imagination from true messages and signs? 

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If you’re looking for some insight into your career, relationships or life in general,  click here for an intuitive reading.

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Screen shot 2013-04-30 at 8.58.51 PMIn the past several months, I’ve let go of a lot: preconceived notions about parenting. My old office job and the predictability that came with it (for maternity leave). Friends who have moved onto different ways of life or friends I’ve outgrown. Clothes that used to fit. Beloved books to make room for new. Control over certain parts of my life (newborns tend to take the reins – at least in the beginning).

I’ve let go of so much and so many that I almost feel dizzy. But I also feel free and lighter than I have in years. I can say I’ve learned a hell of a lot about letting go in my recent history. It hasn’t been easy, sometimes it hurts like hell. When you just accept that pain of letting go is part of the deal, you tend to heal a little faster.

But let’s get real: most of us tend to replay past mistakes over and over again in our head, allowing feelings of shame and regret to shape our actions in the present. Many of us hang on to things and people we know aren’t good for us, for fear of letting go. 

We cling to stale friendships when they long ago stopped teaching us or meaning something to us, hanging on out of obligation and not out of a real desire from the heart.

We hang on to frustration and worry about the future, as if the act of fixation somehow gives us control over it.

We hold grudges over past hurts, promising to never open up/trust/forgive that person ever again.

We hold stress in our minds and bodies, potentially creating serious health issues, and accept that state of tension as the norm.

We hang on to that sweatshirt with holes in it that can’t be seen in public, and the jeans that haven’t fit in 10 years.

We need – we owe it to ourselves - to let go.

“If you let go a little, you will have a little peace. If you let go a lot, you will have a lot of peace.” ~Ajahn Chah

“You must choose between your attachments and happiness.” ~Adyashanti

Letting go means you’re creating space in your heart, home and mind for something new. Who doesn’t want that new breath-taking love, new horizon-expanding friend, new wardrobe,  new way of thinking — soul growth? We don’t incarnate and live this life to stay in the same place all of our lives. We come to grow, change and expand. And in order to do that, we have to let go.

The Universe wants us to be happy.  If you feel yourself anchored in the past, or feel like you’re teetering on the edge of letting go but can’t quite do it, take this article as a sign that it is time to let go. Some of us may feel powerless to let go of what is now behind us – relationships, friendships, a job, an opportunity missed. We may carry regret, shame or disappointment. This is a heavy burden for a person to carry, and it’s okay to let it all go. You owe it to yourself. So let’s do it together: let go and make room for the new. 

Do you struggle with letting go? What (or who) is no longer serving you that you could let go of? Have you ever held on to a relationship that did not suit you? I would love to hear your stories.

If you like what you read here - subscribe to The Daily Awe.

If you’re looking for some insight into your career, relationships or life in general,  click here for an intuitive reading.

 

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