How souls choose their parents and families

How souls choose their parents and families

by Lindsay on October 10, 2013

in Relationships, Souls

Screen shot 2013-10-08 at 12.00.37 PMYears before my baby girl was born, I had a dream that I had a daughter. She came to me and gave me a hug, told me I was her mother, and told me her name was Evelyn. That dream imprinted on my memory and my heart. So much so that when I found out I was pregnant, I knew I was carrying a girl, and she had already told me her name: Evelyn. Meaning wished for child, which couldn’t be more true!

In order to evolve, our souls come to Earth more than once.  I know that as I’ve grown and changed and learned about soul contracts and reincarnation, my thoughts and beliefs have gravitated to this notion.  For those of you who are on the fence about reincarnation, I invite to you to explore the idea that a soul is born into a (different) body for many lifetimes.

It is my belief that once a soul has made the decision to have (another) earthly incarnation, the first step is to decide on what kind of life they want. This is contingent upon what lessons they wish to learn. This involves being matched with a parent or set of parents. This process really depends on the soul’s purpose and desire for specific lessons and lifestyle.

For example,  if two souls had been together before perhaps as a mother and daughter set, then they might wish to relive that experience again or perhaps relive it in reverse, so the daughter becomes the mother in the new lifetime. Sometimes the soul wishes to incarnate in a particular part of the world, and the choice will be less specific to the individual parent.  As diverse as people are, so are our souls and what we wish to create and experience in our lifetime(s).

Once this connection to a potential parent is made, the soul then createes a connection to that person and is present around their energy, waiting to be born at the right time. When I do intuitive readings for clients, I often see the souls of their unborn children waiting for them. I can usually tell if the child is a boy or a girl, and may also get a sense of what they are meant to experience together in this lifetime.

The book Spirit Babies: How to Communicate with the Child You’re Meant to Have is a collection of stories from an intuitive gentleman who spent decades connecting parents with their unborn children. When I do a reading, I cannot guarantee I’ll pick up information about potential unborn children, but more often than not, I do ‘see’ them if they are with you and going to be joining your family in the future.

Of course, parents also have significant influence as to which soul joins their family through conception. Our daily thoughts, desires and purposes create a beacon for souls who respond to these energies. This is particularly true of the mother. According to the Edgar Cayce readings, a woman’s daily activities and inner thoughts during the gestation period create a field much like a magnet would, attracting souls to the field of opportunity life as her child would offer.

As far as families with more than one child, souls also make soul contract/agreements with potential siblings. The energy field and desire of the mother and the souls wanting to incarnate combine to make the decision as to who is born first. I like to imagine my sisters and I floating in the Ether on the “Other Side” deciding to go first, and I in my oldest child splendor and glory pushed through and said, “Me first, of course!” In the case of miscarriage, I’ve noticed that particular soul often comes in through a later pregnancy if the opportunity is presented. I’ve also seen one instance where the miscarried child from a woman went on to be born into her best friend’s family. 

I’ve done readings for folks who have shared a myriad of past lives with the same group of souls – soul groups – all taking turns being siblings, parents and children. One thing I’m certain after doing hundreds of readings is…we certainly do choose our family members, the location we will incarnate, and the different life events that will take place. It is empowering and so very touching for me to know my family members and I chose each other. I feel especially honored that my daughter chose me. What a gift she has given me in this lifetime.

Do you believe souls choose our parents? Do you have any stories of children (or you) remembering past lives and connections in them? 

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{ 13 comments… read them below or add one }

Julie Barrett October 10, 2013 at 8:20 pm

Lindsay, People tell me All Of The Time that Fred must have chosen me for a mother, because no one would fight for him and honor/protect his gifts the way that I do. People who do not Woo. That always makes me laugh, because it seems so true!

I’ve often wondered if Luke was going to come in the second pregnancy but I think not. There is surely divine timing to everything and family dynamics would be so different if they weren’t so far apart in age. I *know* the two boys made an agreement to be brothers! They are like night and day and fight/love with great passion. I have no idea why they chose us for parents but there’s a reason for everything, I guess!

Loved what you said about,”Me, first!” :)


Lindsay October 11, 2013 at 7:10 am

Without a doubt, Fred chose you (and vice versa!). You seem like you were just built to be his advocate and ally in all of this. I wonder what he has done for you in past lives – was he your parent? It all makes me so curious, but of course I know we don’t really need to know while we are incarnated at this time.


Tatiana October 11, 2013 at 12:48 am

I believe in this, definitely. There’s a book called COSMIC CRADLE which is about this idea exactly. And it’s a super thick book about toddlers talking about them being born, what their life was like as a Soul, and why/how they picked their parents. It’s REALLY interesting.

Sometimes it’s difficult for me to come to terms with my Soul having chosen my specific body (since it’s not the type of body I’d want, ironically) or the type of family I have or the country I was born in. (I often wish I was a beautiful girl – who can date whoever I want, and who is desired by everyone – and lives in a village/small town in Europe with a wealthy family who give me all the material things I crave. My life is SO FAR – SOOOOO FAAAAAR – from my fantasy. It’s like the total and complete opposite. It pisses me off).

But I love reincarnation and I love this idea of a Soul choosing their family/body. It puts a lot more in perspective – but I’m still pretty bitter about my life and my body.


Lindsay October 11, 2013 at 7:11 am

Hi Tatiana,

I am going to have to check out that book you mentioned. Sounds right up my alley!

I’m wondering if perhaps your fantasy is an actual past life you’ve had? Maybe you just long for that memory because it was such a good incarnation for you. Or maybe, just maybe, it can be your next one.

I know you’re not the only one left wondering why on god’s green earth they chose a certain body and family. Sometimes, it is a confusing thought….why would my higher self CHOOSE THIS?! Ahhhh.


erica October 11, 2013 at 2:48 pm

I believe this completely!!
My mother was the one that pointed it out to me.
Before I had my children I would always give my mother three angels as gifts for her birthday. There was always three, two girl angels and one boy angel.
years later I had three children, one boy and two girls.
My son when he was 4 or so would tell me he picked me to be his mommy because he wanted me to be happy because I was always crying. Before I had my son we had a couple of miscarriages that really suckerpunched me, I have never told anyone about my state before my son. It really got me off guard. My son also talked about were he had to wait before I could be his mommy. He said it was a large yellow room that was very clean and warm. He said he really liked it there but wanted to come and make me happy.


Ayla October 11, 2013 at 3:18 pm

I’m not sure about the parents thing. I never have quite clicked with my parents and the relationships had always been strained. However, I strongly believe in the possibility that my three daughters were all my siblings in another lifetime, and that this time around my body was simply the vessel in which to bring them here and us together again. We don’t quite have a mother/daughters dynamic so much as we seem to have always had a sisterhood. People often speak of “young souls” or “old souls” and I believe mine has always hovered around the tween age. It explains much of our relationship together. And it certainly makes it more fun!


Lindsey October 11, 2013 at 3:41 pm

I totally believe in this concept! I have had 5 people tell me in the past year that we have a little girl waiting to become our daughter. My husband and I have been trying to conceive for about a year and a half now. Sometimes with the fertility journey is trying, I just remind myself that she is there and how much I am looking forward to meeting her.


Rachelle October 11, 2013 at 9:22 pm

My mom died 5 years before my daughter was born. When she was 3 we were returning home from an out-of-state visit to my mom’s family. We were riding quietly through the mountains when she said she remembered seeing my mom in Heaven, when she herself was still in God’s hands. She remembered my mom wearing her long hair pulled back in a barrette. We had not had a lengthy or descriptive conversation about my mom at that time. She hadn’t even seen pictures. She just knew my mom was in Heaven with God. I couldn’t even respond or turn around. I just sat there, looking at the river below crying.
There have been many more of these kinds of moments as she has grown. She is now 10. This little girl is very special, and I believe with all of my heart that she and God chose my husband and me because we needed her. Way more than we ever knew.


Eric Holmes October 13, 2013 at 12:46 am

I was still quite difficult to understand what you write, but this is precisely the greater interest, Greetings


Gav October 16, 2013 at 8:37 am

I definitely think we choose our parents, however I don’t feel I was ever on this Earth before.


Simon October 21, 2013 at 7:26 am

I really enjoyed reading your post. I also believe that we choose the family and environment that we want to be born in which ties in with the experiences that we want to have whilst in our physical bodies on this earth and we do this again and again with the same family members.

I agree that this realization is very empowering.

Thanks for sharing your post.


Ryan Biddulph October 22, 2013 at 3:32 am

Without a doubt Lindsay. I also believe in reincarnation. Knowing the infinite, perfect nature of the Universe, I believe that any soul which inhabits a human or animal body, especially if the body undergoes great suffering, as we see here in the street dogs of India, that soul is experiencing something for future, different, lives.

Love the message here. Thank you Lindsay :)



Evan November 18, 2013 at 11:38 am

I find this very interesting, but on the other hand I wonder about children who were born into horrible lives of abuse and suffering. Did they choose that? Is there a purpose for it if they did? A test maybe for the parents to love them and treat them right?
I also wonder about animals. Sometimes I feel like I look at them and I know there is someone in there with feelings, just unable to communicate the way people do. They do seem to gravitate to me. Is that strange?


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